Christian live differently and talk differently.
We are a new creation, with a new heart, and a new mouth.
Indeed, the tongue is the best of you or the worst of you.
How should we speak?
1. Speak Truthfully
Ephesians 4:25 Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak TRUTHFULLY to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body.
Stop lying, no more half-truth, tell the truth, let honesty be your best policy.
Proverbs 12:19 Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.
You can lie for a moment, but you cannot lie forever. You can lie to somebody, but you cannot lie to everybody.
You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time. - Abraham Lincoln
Lying is very burdensome because you have to keep track and remember all the lies that you have said. It's better to tell the truth and don't have to worry about forgetting what you said.
Speaking truthfully is not only about not lying, it's also about the sincerity of your heart.
Proverbs 26:28 A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin.
The Bible warns against those who flatter others with a hidden agenda.
Jude 16 These men are grumblers and faultfinders; they follow their own evil desires; they boast about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage.
Proverbs 28:23 In the end, people appreciate frankness more than flattery.
2. Speak Lovingly
Ephesians 4:15 Instead, speaking the truth in LOVE, we will in all things grow up into Him who is the Head, that is, Christ.
Speak truthfully does not mean harsh and unkind words.
Don't use the truth to beat people up. Shine the light to show the way, not to blind people's eyes.
Truth without love hurt others
Love without truth harm others
Truth with love help others
Proverbs 27:5-6 Better is open rebuke than hidden love. 6 Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.
3. Speak Wisely
Proverbs 12:18 Thoughtless words can wound as deeply as any sword, but WISELY spoken words can heal.
To speak wisely is to be tactful, appropriate and guided by the Word of God.
Being sensitive, considerate and thoughtful in your words.
Your have an option with your words: either heal or hurt, develop or destroy, build up or tear down. Which one would you choose?
Proverbs 16:23 Intelligent people THINK before they speak; what they say is then more persuasive.
Think before you speak. Bear in mind the occasion, the timing, and the need.
Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
4. Speak Graciously
Colossians 4:6 Let your speech always be with GRACE, as though seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person.
Gracious words are kind and gentle words.
How we speak and what we say can either calm down or heat up, persuade or provoke. Which do you prefer?
Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 25:15 Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone.
The key is in the tone, and the secret is found in patience.
Instead of blasting your displeasure, anger and accusation, learn to speak graciously, using kind and gentle words.
Proverbs 16:24 GRACIOUS words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.
An old saying: "You get more bees with honey than with vinegar."
5. Speak Politely
Never take people for granted. Always observe good manners and courtesy when you speak. It reflects more about you than the other person.
Philemon 8-9 That is why I am boldly asking a favor of you. I could demand it in the name of Christ because it is the right thing for you to do, 9 but because of our love, I prefer just to ask you. So take this as a request from your friend Paul, an old man, now in prison for the sake of Christ Jesus.
Turn your demands into requests.
Learn to say “please,” “thank you” and “I’m sorry.”
Isaiah 50:4 The Sovereign LORD has given me an instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to LISTEN like one being taught.
Listen and learn, first from the Lord and from people around you, then you will know how you should speak.